So, a week ago I decided to take pity on my snaggle toothed cat, and buy him a can of wet food as a treat.
Obviously this was a bad idea, else why would I be writing about it?
So.... Stewie has never had this delicious wet food business. I got all paranoid one day thinking he had lost weight, and felt sorry for him and got him his very first can of wet food ever. He loved it. It was like kitty on meth, happy as a clam and going at it like a fat kid with an ice cream cake. Ridiculous.
Fast forward 3 days and the cat still.has.not.eaten.anything. He has a huuuuge bowl of healthy, crunchy dry food in the kitchen, just begging for kitty to come over and nom on it, but no. Instead, the god damn cat runs through the house like his ass is on fire, squealing and whining over not having processed pig assholes for dinner.
And then the moping. He would sit next to the dish and whine... put his chin on the counter... peer around the wall at me on the couch like I had killed his mother and he was going to die RIGHTTHISMINUTE from starvation. Call the fucking Waaahmbulance, cause Stewie is being abused. Even him peering around the corner, one glowing evil yellow eye fixed on me, wasn't enough to make me buy him more of that stinky shit.
Well... it had been 6 days with kitty not eating. Apparently the cat out-does me for stubborn, cause I bought him more wet food.
Sigh. The animal wins again.